Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Missing...

This week marks the 17th year that my PaPa has been gone.  Last month my Nannie had been gone four.
I'm missing them terribly for some reason.
I look back at the little snapshots of my life with them (which was too short of a time) and I'm filled to the brim with love and joy and happiness.  Oh how I wish they were with me still.

I remember Papa's smell after he had been at the DryCleaners (where he worked) all day.  Better yet, I remember his Brut aftershave.

Memories of Nannie working in the kitchen, whizzing here and whizzing there bustle around in my head.  I can't even keep up with her in my mind.

Like a photograph, I stare into the past savoring something as simple as my Papa's feet propped up on a big tacky blue velvet pillow resting on the coffee table.  I cried when my mom got rid of those pillows.

Nannie's calling, "Kelly (papa)...Little Kelli (& me), come on...dinner's ready!"

Papa jumps up and dances a jig all the way to the kitchen with me in tow.

I read and reread a letter written to me by Nannie while I was in college...before she lost her ability to write.

And emblazoned in my heart is the strength and tenderness that embodied my Papa.

I would give anything to hug my Nannie again.

My world would be complete if I could hold Papa's hand again.

At times like this, the only thing that brings me peace is knowing they are together...with Jesus.  And I will indeed see them again.

Until then I grasp tight onto the meaning they brought to my existence and pray that they are looking down on me with that same love, joy and happiness that they bestowed unto me.

If they are...

Thank you and I love you both so much.

(I'm sharing this as part of Mom's 30-Minute Blog Challenge over at SteadyMom)

Please make sure you tune in tomorrow for a very special interview and giveaway!
Here's a sneak peak...

  

Blessings,

5 comments:

Kim & Dave said...

Seems like you might need a hug! Cyber hug comming your way!

I am so thankful for wonderful memories of my grandparents-& I am thankful that I CAN have them. Many people I know have no good memories to go back to......

Holly said...

Grandparents are such wonderful parts of our lives. I am sending you a cyber hug too. All of my grandparents were gone by the time I was 10 - I never got to tell them what they meant to me. I hope I showed it. Every time I smell Ivory soap, I look for my grandpa.

Marianne said...

Grandparents are so important in a childs world. I am so sad sometimes that my children won't get to experience the kind of grandparents I had. Grandparents who always had time for me and who were always there every day. My parents live to far away to be able to be that kind of grandparents, though they would have loved to do so. And my husbands parents are too busy working every day and to tired at the end of the day to want to have my kids over for a visit more than a couple of times a month.
My grandparents are all passed away now and I miss them sorely.

Kelly said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Grandparents are a special sort of joy, aren't they. I loved reading about your memories of two very special people.

se7en said...

That is a beautiful memoir! Just lovely... Isn't it funny how just one little thing can trigger so many memories. You have a good week!